Big Brother Sleeps In, Farts On Little Sister

Let's all admit right now that we have no clue how the government works. You can state all you just copied from a Wiki entry, but on penalty of asshole-waxing you cannot tell me what the Checks & Balances are. (it's how Government sets the standard for all corporations to stifle anything before it gets out of control and actually gets work done) But somehow our government, where the average representative - that's the place where there are 435 of 'em pulling a $174K salary - works a 3-day week in between committee meetings. And getting Lobbyist luncheon BJs. And bathing in slime.

So our Government cannot find a budget that works so they'll just quit and not show up? Sorry, there's no money to keep the lights on for a day? Bullshit. Get in there and fix that shit. This is the GOVERNMENT, it's somewhat important to people who think community activity isn't worth the time. It's maddening, truly. Big Brother wants to sleep in. Wants to roll over, take a rip off the bong, and nap until the weekend. Aren't we throwing firepower down Libya's throat for some reason dressed up to make it not look like oil?

They need to just go in there and push some shit around, look busy. Until now it doesn't appear anything has been done anyway. Seriously. And we're all too upside down in our tent mortgages to have the bag to skip a day of work, and REALLY shut the show down. You want to enact change, you don't vote. You get 50% of a workforce to dis-a-fucking-ppear for a Tuesday with no explanation. Send a message about who is in control.

Same thing in Washington, DC. This article tells the tales of those who are really affected by the stoppage: People making the $30K-$50K a year who're just scraping by in the economy's wet-fart of a recovery. The people who make the coffee, sweep the floors, shine the shoes, cut the hair, fold the shirts, make the meetings, unlock the doors, mop the bathrooms... they disappear for ONE DAY... shit'll get changed. Kinda like a "Day Without A Mexican," but documented.

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MC, HOST, CORPORATE, COMEDY, SEATTLE, GEOFF, LOTT

Booze Clues on I-1100 and I-1105 (a nod to Chilidog Dennison)

Washington State is broke. We have a deficit for social services which include Police and Fire Departments. Our public education system progresses, but teeters. Voters keep saying "No Taxes" yet forget that Taxes are what keep potholes filled, crosswalks lit, and school programs open long enough for them to go to work and make money to pay to the OTHER F'ed-up Washington.

If you own a bar, drink a fair amount, enjoy alcohol, enjoy sanity, worry about DUIs, and want to see how you'd be affected YOU MUST CHECK OUT THESE 2 LINKS!!!

There are 2 initiatives (I-1100, I-1105) we have coming up for Vote in November in WA State regarding Alcohol. While we can all agree with Homer J. Simpson that booze is the "Cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems." It was actually a great writer, not Homer, but I digress...
These initiatives are intended to deregulate and free-up the current state of liquor sales in the state. They are relatively arcane and do need an overhaul. Currently, you can only purchase hard liquor/spirits through a state-run store. It provides tens to hundreds of millions of dollars each year into the quickly-emptying coffers of our state. Distribution isn't real slick to the bars and restaurants, either.

I-1100 (PRIVATIZE) states, per the WA Secretary Of State:
This measure would direct the liquor control board to close all state liquor stores; terminate contracts with private stores selling liquor; and authorize the state to issue licenses that allow spirits (hard liquor) to be sold, distributed, and imported by private parties. It would repeal uniform pricing and certain other requirements governing business operations for distributors and producers of beer and wine. Stores that held contracts to sell spirits could convert to liquor retailer licenses.

I-1105 (REVISE) states, per the WA Secretary Of State:
This measure would direct the liquor control board to close all state liquor stores and to license qualified private parties as spirits retailers or distributors. It would require licensees to pay the state a percentage of their first five years of gross spirits sales; repeal certain taxes on retail spirits sales; and direct the board to recommend to the legislature a tax to be paid by spirits distributors. It would revise other laws concerning spirits.

So, 1100 removes the State as the gatekeeper to booze.
1105 revises the rules to allow private sellers (Costco, Safeway, Bartells, etc.) to get licenses to sell booze, give a portion back to the state for 5 years and repeal other taxes.

Here's my take as a mid-30's married man whose work as a Comedian happens in bars and clubs with most people drinking a'cahaul:
1) Our state's too broke to give up the nearly $500M we'd lose over the next 5 years if these pass. We're too broke to give up ANY money.
2) To make up the shortfall, booze would have to be taxed so heavily that it basically would revert to the same bottom line it's at now, or people would have to start drinking they way they REALLY want to instead of responsibly enjoying it, and then there's a whole other barfpool to wade through.
3) We need new regulations and we need new distribution allowances; it's too costly and too clunky for bars and eateries to get what they need. These are not the way to do it. Too vague.
4) I don't want booze available in grocery stores, which already have kids stealing Energy Drinks!!! for crying out loud. A minor drinking alcohol should be up to the parents. (wink)
5) California sells booze in grocery stores. How are THEY doing?
6) These don't help small businesses. Costco, Safeway, and other big stores could undercut prices to other retailers, including bars and restaurants. It's not "Free Market," it's "Dominate Market." It favors big chains and high volumes.
7) I like shopping for booze with adults. I don't want to buy booze at a grocery store while I'm silently crying and my son stares up at me from the cart.
7a) Similarly, I don't want liquor available in gas stations and KwikMarts until 2am.

I am voting No on each one. I think there should be reform on the sale and distribution to Businesses that sell/resell alcohol, but the complete Slash & Burn of the State's involvement strips tax money we need, makes it more visible to children, and allows it to get into places with fewer restrictions and regulatory incentives to not sell to minors.

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Hubris, Scariness, and Americanity

Another MTV event was allowed to happen, so I have to figure out which sponsors to boycott emotionally as opposed to just being ignorant of their body wash or fat-burning pill. Mind you, I confirmed the speed of my metabolism today when my "natural energy" pill kicked in about 45minutes AFTER my workout ended... but that's for another blahg.

MTV is a show that somehow is now involved in publicizing the film exploits of actors who aren't really comedians, but aren't decent-enough actors to emote beyond "irony... get it?" Yeah... got it. And tonight there was an awards show for the movies. I still cannot understand why there's an awards show for short-films of musical artists lip-synching in a rainy warehouse during both a rainstorm AND a Recession, but that's for yet a DIFFER'NT blahg.

What the f*ck am I doing? I don't even care about that stuff. I'm not truly upset about the intellectual vacuum from which MTV programming emanates. I'm now mid-30's and outside their demographic, and look back not in bitterness but in snickery goodness. Truly I am hoping they don't abandon programming covering the tailspin of Spencer Pratt's existence. Money and fame makes us more of what we truly are. He truly is a megalomanical narcissist. And a dork.

If there was to be any sort of terror attack at a place that exudes "American Dipshit" it ought'n be at any of the MTV Award shows. It's the sweat-crack of all that is "tween" in America, an impressionable group of people with more buying power and less financial savvy than most failed mortgage brokers of the past 5 years. Fine. But there it is... if ever you wanted to unite a front against a common enemy to this nation you gotta get a "terrorist" to Kanye West a Justin Bieber performance. BOOM, child army on the way.

And yet every time there's some sort of terrorist threat to our nation, 'specially from within, then the news reports every little self-congratulatory pat that our Homeland Security officers throw at their backs upon the stoppage of the plan. I am VERY grateful we have an office slated to stop terror within our borders. It's a frightening, maddening fact. But we gotta stop saying how we found the terrorists in the first place.

How about a news report of how the Homeland Security office admitted not being able to really tell if anybody was a terrorist or not, and how it's not even a misdemeanor to plan such an attack, as long as it's admitted to local authorities? Drum up some of the low-hanging froots and kindly end up in their living rooms while they sleep in musty corners with guns drawn and faces smiling!

Okay, just got an IM from "LISTAGENT@hsa.gov" whomever that is, so I gotta split. I probably made a "No-Fly" list.

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