The Geoff Lott Rules Live Tour Of Comedy & Talking

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Saturday, October 25, 2008

No, Not In My MySpace Space

Ty Willingham is a ridiculous tiny coach and should be fired.

Well, they finally did it to themselves.

More Money and Power make people more of who they really are. If you're a little paranoid about a little power and money, a lot will drive you further behind the fortress of cereal boxes you built at breakfast. You'd be alone, mind you, as paranoia's accusatory onslaught carries all the charm of a mosquito buzzing in your ear while your grandmother screams "HUH? HUH?" and you repeat your answer until she asks ANOTHER question, and all you can think of is how you can't wait to fake-Gay-Out yourself into banishment and away from this lovely - but stone deaf - woman's underbaked hams. You suffer because, dag-nabbit, they DESERVE your attention. And cards played right, you're getting the LP collection upon her passing, now 19 years overdue.

MySpace, a FOX/Murdoch-owned entity, has created a way to simultaneously look Safe AND Paranoid. If you have a Space account and tried to log in this morning you may have been greeted with a Verification window. It's an application that generates random numbers and letters in varied order and linear formation so that you have to take a typing test in order to log in and see who called you Gay. Or Republican.

You know that first time you did a mountain of cocaine and then over the next few months you were Super Positive that the monkey in the rhododendron was, in fact, a CIA operative? And then, to make sure she couldn't get in when you were gone, you stopped leaving the house? And THEN, to make sure she couldn't get in when you were home, you duct-taped the doors shut? Well that's what MySpace did.

Instead of investing in security WITHIN the network, they threw up a giant snorfling gate and said "TRY TO CROSS." And no matter what combo you entered, whether is was Correct, Right, or Perfect, you and your desire to be looked-at wasn't getting in. And I thought to myself:

"Well, they finally did it. They went ahead and hit critical mass of management, and locked us all out. Awesome." I was happy about it. It wasn't like having a withdrawal, no shakes or bugs. Just a feeling of relief that they'd put themselves out of our misery. MySpace, for all it's influence and ability to connect people, is really now aimed at people younger than myself, hornier than myself, and drunker than myself. FINE, that's why I'm getting more into FaceBook, anyway.

So, soon I'll dump the MySpace Account, as soon as I figure out the FaceBook a bit more. And when I do, you will all follow me to FaceBook.
Why?
What are you looking for? What do I have that you need?
Before you say another word, you'll need to know my secret phrase.

Which is?

"GET UNDER THE COFFEE TABLE, THE GRIDDLE IS HOT"

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Monday, October 20, 2008

For UW Fans Only

Ty Willingham is the current head football coach at the University of Washington. The legacy of UW football is one of tough linemen, stout defense, and class, not to mention winning. Willingham, at this moment, has a record of 11-31. 11 Wins. 31 Losses. If you finished 11 of 42 assignments on time at your job, you would have been fired at the 20-miss mark.

And yet Ty won't step down, and the Athletic Director won't fire him, because of some type of "commitment." This is a business. If you are this bad, your position needs to be handled by somebody else. The Dawgs are being embarrassed on a weekly basis, not by the other teams who trounce them, but by the coach and the staff that fails them. Jake Locker could have gone ANYWHERE in the nation to play QB. He chose the UW. And he's come up short because these coaches cannot properly implement the plan around the main cog. So where does that leave us?

Well, Ty Willingham is nothing if not staunch. He's stubborn. He's stone-faced and tries to remain positive about all of this, making excuses for how this one got away. Every friggin' week. SCREW THAT. I want a coach that screams about how his defensive coordinator isn't coaching downward to make sure that LBs and Safeties aren't taking bad angles on ball carriers breaking into the secondary... AGAIN. And a line coach that demands we get at least 2 guys over 290lbs with suspect police involvement in their past. And yet Ty sits there and challenges everyone outside the program to figure out what's wrong. He has no answers. It's NOT WORKING OUT, TYRONE.

He needs to step down. This is not "quitting," mind you. If it was 3 games into a season and they'd lost 3 in a row, that's quitting. But he's lost 8 in a row, and is facing the meat of the Pac-10 schedule here. And he has the fates and attitudes of 100 UW football players on his desk every day. And he has cut a lot of ties to Husky greats because he doesn't rally the past into the present. That's affecting the future, also, because great potential recruits are dropping visits to the UW in favor of rival schools in the Pac-10, and elsewhere.

So if the UW is concerned about the future and present of UW Football, they need to fire Ty. Ty's not going to quit. He's only going to drive further the plow through the minds of these players about what it takes to win a game, and the deeper and longer that rut, the harder it will be to fill it back in. FIRE TY WILLINGHAM. Yesterday.



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Sunday, October 19, 2008

Register, THEN Vote

Remember, you have to be registered as a local citizen in order to vote in the upcoming elections.

This is not a concert where you show up, flash an ID and get a stamp to Vote however you like on Nov. 4th.

Just a reminder, friendly-style.



Take Me Home

My Blog About My Dad