Saddam said in court today that he’s not afraid of execution. The former dictator of Iraq, a sadistic, torturing, madman, who is sure to have Hell waiting for him, is not afraid of to die. He basically is daring them to kill him.
They should not do that. Do not kill Saddam Hussein. In fact, they should start talking to him about what kind of reparations he could make in order to go free. They need to ask him why he thinks he should not be punished. And let him plead that case. And nod along, make notes, nod, note, nod, note. They should bring up the numerous charges of torture, murder, corruption, and scandal, and let him rebut against each charge. And when the talking’s done, they should deliberate for a day or two.
After this deliberation, they should call Saddam back to court, and say “Hey man, you weren’t a very benevolent leader. You did some really awful things. Most of the rest of the world hates you. But some people love you, and would love to harbor you upon your release. So we’re going to release you, and let you fend for yourself.”
Then, as he heads back to the jail to sign the paperwork, he’s greeted by many people on roadside holding signs of praise for him. He gets to the prison, signs his paperwork, and heads for the door.
Which is when the tribunal council says “Nah, we change our minds. We’re going to torture you. Death’s too good for you. We’ll webcam the whole deal, too. Hell, we’re going to have people e-mailing what we should do to you next. High-bidders will be able to tazer you from time to time. You're not gonna Hitler your way outta this one. Buckle up, it’s gonna be a while.”
OR, he can toss salads every day for a month.
The Geoff Lott Administration has begun.
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Geoff Lott: Comedian, Writer, Philosoteur. I am here to amuse you, not entertain you. If not now, later. If not you, somebody else. If you can't laugh at yourself, that's just fine, too. I will do it for you.
