Mitch Hedberg, Dead At 37.

As of last night when this was originally written, the passing of Mitch Hedberg had not been confirmed. This morning, sadly, it has been. Mitch Hedberg, well known and loved stand-up comic, is dead. He was 37.

Mitch is one of the most-quoted, most-copped comics of the past 10 years. The rest of this entry will cover that topic. Heart failure is being noted as the cause of Mitch's death. Apparently he was born with a defect in his heart.

Mitch had is own way of doing things, especially in the past few years. Mitch was famous for less than 10 years. Less than The Dave Matthews Band. Less than Snoop. And he's gone now.

Nobody will ever see Mitch again. That is what really stinks, on many levels. He was talented. He was a good person, from all I'd heard. He was a phenomenal comic. I hope this will begin the downstroke of people copying Mitch's style of drawling, simplified, peripheral brilliance. I hope it will begin the outpouring of stories of what a great guy he was. Appreciate his work and his life. I have removed some of the stuff I had on here about Mitch's personal life, out of respect for a Person, and because he could have died with a cup of green tea in his hand, or a turkey-baster full of smack in his veins, neither would matter to how much he meant to comedy and to what kind of person Mitch was.

My condolences go out to Mitch's family and his real friends. He had a talent so recognizable that we won't see it again until an open-mic'er steals his persona and nicks his material.

To those who stood by while Mitch destroyed his body and career, my middle finger goes out to you. He was your bank account, your dealer, your hook-up, and you can look forward to an eternity in Hell, where every night you host an endless open mic where everyone goes up and "does Mitch."


Terry Schiavo also died this morning. That's for another time, but I really wish politicians and people in tank tops would leave her alone. The question here: If you were Terry Schiavo, would you want to die with dignity, or be kept alive to keep your parents from feeling bad?
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(Now back to the original blog)
In my quest to find out who is and is not dead (IS: Johnny Cochrane, Nietzche, Comedy. IS NOT: You, Me, Comedy) I happened upon an exchange of words in the alt.comedy.standup newsgroup in the Usenet world. To spare you the boredom, it's where comics get together and let their egos go wild as they post messages while doing what comics love to do best: Not be interrupted. Perhaps only the comics who read this blog will get any joy out of this, but I figure it's worth sharing.

First off, the topic of Stealing in Comedy. Here are some highlights:

• "Joke-eoke," as in Karaoke. I believe Killorn notified us of this last week, and it's been noted by one comic who started the thread in the forum. He basically was saying that there are so many guys working in comedy these days that you don't even have to be a comic to get work. What is a comic? I can't really define it, but I will say this: If I could get the same pay from comedy that I do from my crappy day job, I would have ass-wiped a signature on my 2 Week Notice a LONG time ago. But Comedy doesn't pay well because, here, catch the 22, there are so many guys working. Question: How do so many guys become funny enough to go on the road? Answer: Who said they were funny?
  
• Being Unique on stage, being a truth of yourSELF. A quote from the thread:

We need to look at how famous comics selected and developed their personas. Study what "Larry the Cable Guy" did to build his persona. Because jokes come and go, and can't be protected, but a strong, recognizable persona is like a signature and everyone can smell it if somebody tries a forgery.

Basically, as a performer, you are yourSelf, turned up a notch or two. I have heard guys from Portland talk to me in the whitest, most Eddie Bauer'ed tone you can imagine, then go on stage with a slightly Southern-fried accent in order to affect the persona that makes their jokes work. Question: Are they faking it in order to be funny? Answer: Who said they were funny?

• Stealing is addressed in the thread. It goes from the Vaudeville days through to Buster Keaton getting hacked by Red Skelton, hacked by Benny Hill, hacked by whomever. I've heard the freakishly popular Larry The Cable Guy (Dan Whitney, doing a character) do twists on street jokes (those are the ones you get in your e-mail from the official workplace funny guy/gal!) And it's rampant. Here's another quote from one JJay Boyd:

Hell me and the 2 comics I am on the road with had 2 off nights in the
pacific northwest.... we did some open mic nights.. EVERY comic from
this town? Was stealing.. (short of ONE tall girl who had the guts to
do her own stuff and was very promising).. One guy was doing Andrew
Dice Clays Nursery Rhymes but as Jimmy Stewart... so I guess in his
mind thats DIFFERENT. (sic)

Does anybody know if JJay Boyd has been through Seattle? First off, saying "EVERY comic" in "This town" of the Pacific Northwest (narrowed down nicely, thank you JJay) steals is a very broadly sweeping statement. However, at an open mic I'm betting a fair amount of the personas seen on stage were direct lifts of well-known acts. And the open mics around here are usually testing grounds for people getting their rocks off without the intent of pursuing stand-up, and/or a few actual working comics either working out a few new bits or getting their rocks off with the intent of pursuing chicks in the audience. The ONE Tall Girl may very well have been the inimitable (it's a good word, relax) Lizzy Pilcher. Just giving props where props be due.

• Currently bored as shit with that thread (read it yourself) I summarize the stealing thread with this: I always want to be told if something I do on-stage is a lift. There is something called "parallel development" where a topic is viewed in a similar light by different people. A bit I wrote the 2nd month I'd been on-stage is pretty similar to one done by Greg Giraldo (no more links for now, look him up) so I dropped it. I will write more. Other than that, and this goes for any situation in life, don't be afraid to protect what is yours, and don't be afraid to be classy in doing so. You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar, that's what my gramma used to say. She always had very crunchy honey. (see, writing Hedberg is easy)

I have been party to "blog wars" in the past. They are really f*cking stupid. I learned that if I have a problem with someone it's better to find a resolution the old fashioned way, but when they live in an apartment it can be tough and dangerous to drop the flaming crapsack at their front door.
That's a joke.
ANYwho, here's a "blog war" of sorts, a thread flaming if you will. Two guys get into it with each other, and it's really really dumb. Not only do they keep saying "Go away" or "I win," THEY KEEP RETURNING TO THE POST. Insecurity is that voice that tells you to check, one more time, to make sure the door is locked. It's a minor form of insanity, and it's a great lesson in growing up.
Stand back and watch them windmill at each other. I'm really embarrassed to say I ever got involved in that shit.

Anywho, I'm off to bed now. I've been writing for over an hour.

The Moral Of The Story Is This:
If you're going to steal someone's act, and that person's on-stage persona, instead of trying your hardest to be original, make sure you also cop their off-stage habits.
In the corporate world, stealing someone's ideas is called "Middle Mangement."

Good night, get home safely, and remember to tip your cows.

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